I was just watching Zookeeper and thinking about the way the people were acting in it. I know the movie itself is all about being who you really are, but the sad fact is there are people who totally miss the point, and people who actually act like what was depicted in the movie.

Griffin became something that he wasn’t in order to try to win a girl who wasn’t even right for him. Unfortunately, a lot of people do this, and actually women do it more than men. People will change everything about themselves in order to get someone to want them. The thing is, if they want you to change to suit their desires, then they’re not right for you. Eventually, the relationship is going to fall apart because you don’t really become what they want, or because you realize you’re miserable pretending to be someone else.

Stephanie wanted him to be a totally different person than he really was. She saw his “potential” and went into the relationship hoping he’d become someone else. No one should ever go into a relationship wanting or expecting the other person to change. You should find someone you can be happy with as they are. No one should ever have to become a different person to please you.

Stephanie was also an idiot. Any woman who would be attracted to a guy who alternates insulting and complimenting her or values money over personality has serious issues. Any man who would treat a woman that way or act like such a douche to anyone is an asshole. It is never okay to insult or degrade someone. Money is never more important than heart. People like that really need to get their shit together and learn how to become worthy human beings.

Kate was the right kind of person, and luckily Griffin saw that in the end. She loved him as he was. That’s what a good relationship is all about. Helping one another be the best that they can be is great, but wanting someone to totally alter their life and personality isn’t. When people come together they should be looking to enrich each other, not radically transform one another.

The lesson to be learned: Always be yourself and look for someone who can love you the way you are. You should only try to make each other better, not different. Even if you think that who you really are is someone that no one could ever love, you’re wrong. There is always someone out there looking for someone just like you. Your only job is to be the best you that you can be. Everything else will come in time.

Briana Blair

Briana Blair is an author and artisan. She has published more then 30 books and thousands of articles across multiple sites. After practicing Paganism and witchcraft for 25 years, she's now on a journey as an atheist and skeptic. She's eclectic, unpredictable, and always evolving. Facebook - Twitter