|This site is completely ad-free. Please Support us by making a donation.|
What have the movies taught you about life?
This is just a quick look at some of the things that movies have taught us. Some of it is humorous; some of it could really help you out some day.
Lesson #1: Don’t wear red shirts. The “red shirt” is expendable, and always the first to die.
Lesson #2: Geeks are just hotties in disguise. Give them new clothes and some styling products and you’ll realize that they’re the guy/girl of your dreams. And don’t forget, geeks are better people than jocks and socialites, so always go for the geek.
Lesson #3: If you’re being chased, whether it’s by a bear, an axe murderer or a zombie, don’t ever look back. Just assume that they’re behind you, and keep running. As soon as you look back, there’s going to be a tree branch or broken heel that will cause you to trip, and you’ll be toast.
Lesson #4: What the dung hits the fan, never split up. It’s just a fact that the nut that goes off on their own is going to end up in big trouble, or dead.
Lesson #5: Stay fit. Cardio is going to pay off big time when you’re being chased, or when you have to hack and slash your way to safety.
Lesson #6: Long, bladed weapons are your best defense against most enemies. Swords and machetes never jam, they don’t have kickback, and they never run out of ammo.
Lesson #7: When you realize that the creepy call is coming from inside the house, go outside! Running upstairs and locking yourself in a room is just stupid.
Lesson #8: Never underestimate a girl. A female will happily stab a stiletto through your skull, claw your eyes out, knee you in the crotch or do other evil things to you. Chicks are dangerous. You’ve been warned.
Lesson #9: Never tick off a computer geek. They might not be able to engage in fisticuffs, but they will empty your bank account, spam everyone using your email, and possibly put you on the top 10 most wanted list.