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I mentioned in a previous post how so many people are embracing superficial, finance-oriented values. That’s one of many reasons for each and every one of us to look inside ourselves and find all the things that make us amazing. We need to be able to love ourselves, no matter what the outside world may say to bring us down.
In a society where people value income over personality, accept unrealistic, surgery-enhanced aesthetics as real beauty and in general disregard what’s of true importance, we as individuals have to remember what is important, and let it shine within ourselves. We also need to know how to see it in others and remind them that it exists.
Countless people have self-esteem issues because they don’t live up to the shallow expectations that the media has caused people to have. We worry that we’re fat, unfit, ugly, not wealthy enough, not influential enough and so many other things. We look down on ourselves because the world looks down on us. Unfortunately, more people will try to tear you down in life than will try to lift you up. So it becomes up to each of us to shake off the negativity of the world around us, ignore the hurtful words, and look within ourselves to find whatever it is that makes us amazing.
I’m not wealthy, nor am I a super model. I’ve taken a lot of shit for those things in my day. However, I know that I am pretty. I know that I have beautiful eyes, great hair, nice curves and a nice smile. I know that I work hard, I’ve accomplished more than a lot of people who have more money, I’m living my dreams, and my day will come when I’ll gain wealth from all my dedication and talent. I don’t have college degrees, but I know more than a lot of people who do. I’ve never been to art school but I have more talent than many who have. I’m struggling financially but I still give time and money to those less fortunate than myself. I’m honest, loving, and a devoted friend. I am wonderful, no matter what anyone out there might try to say based on superficial standards.
You need to look at yourself and your life and see what it is that makes you worthy. You all have something. Don’t allow the negativity of others kill your heart. Those who tear you down see something in you they don’t have. It’s only jealousy and pettiness that make people act that way. Someone with a good heart would never tear someone down without reason. They would show you how amazing you are and encourage you to shine. In the absence of supportive, loving people in your life, you need to find it within yourself.
I’ve counseled quite a few people with self-esteem issues, often victims of psychological and emotional abuse, who are so down they’ve thought of or even tried committing suicide. I have given them the same task I’ll give you now:
Take a piece of paper or make a document on your computer. Write down every little thing about you that’s good. Push away any thoughts of what others have said. Search your heart and find your own truth. Are you honest? Are you supportive and loving to others? Do you have some talent like music or art? Can you make people smile? Are you good with animals? Look at every aspect of yourself and write down every good thing, no matter how small. Once you’ve got a list started, go back and add more detail to each point, and allow your heart to tell you other good things you can add to the list. As you come to truly know yourself, you’ll find more things to add.
It’s also a good idea to take a long look in the mirror. Stand nude in front of a mirror and look at every part of yourself from head to toe. What’s good about how you look? Do you have gorgeous eyes? A great nose? Cute toes? Do you love your curves, muscles, or even love that you’re kind of skinny? Write down every single thing you like. As before, add more details to why, and you will find that you see more of yourself to like.
Keep these lists and look at them from time to time. If you’re too embarrassed you can keep it in your head. Look at or think about all your good qualities on a regular basis. Lean on them whenever someone says something hurtful or degrading to you. Remember that their opinion is just that, an opinion. It’s not fact, it’s only a matter of their personal, and possibly twisted perception. You need to love you, that’s the most important thing in the world. As you feel better about yourself physically and as a person, you’ll see that you’ll attract people who love you as you are, and people who will remind you that those other people are ignorant and no good for you.
Whatever you do, never change yourself to suit other people’s opinions, and never allow yourself to be crushed by the words of petty fools. be yourself. Let your own light shine, whether others like it or not. You have to be true to yourself and find your own joy in who you are and how you look. You’ll never be able to make everyone around you have a good opinion of you, and it’s foolish to even try. That path only leads to misery. Seek your own good features and learn to love the real you. Anyone who really matters in your life will love that too.