How to Kill a Vampire (If You Ever Meet One) - BrianaDragon Creations

How to Kill a Vampire (If You Ever Meet One)

Be sure to check out our shop! New customers get a 5% off coupon!
Rosary Cross beads Necklace - Image: Public Domain, Pixabay
Posted by / August 2, 2014 / 0 Comments

This site is completely ad-free. Please Support us by making a donation.

There are lots of myths and legends as to what will kill a vampire. I’m going to tell you some of the things you might try if you ever come up against one of these undead creatures of the night. (Of course, if I met a vampire, I think I’d sit it down, give it a drink and pick it’s brain for a while, but that’s just me *wink*)

How to dispatch the undead…

…If you think you need to.

*Stake them through the heart with a sharpened piece of wood (if you can get that close) This will kill pretty much anything, so be careful, you wouldn’t wanna accidentally stake dad or your SO. Keep plenty of pencils around for close combat!

*Hold up a cross to defend yourself (and hope it scares them off) Of course, a cross only works if you have faith, and not on all vamps.

*Throw holy water on them (and pray they don’t find it refreshing) If you can find somewhere to get holy water from in the first place. Alternately, you could drink holy water every day, so when they bite you, you’ll be contaminated.

*Light them on fire (and hope they die before they get hold of you) Keep that Zippo and lighter fluid handy! Or do the ol’ lighter and hairspray trick.

*Expose them to sunlight (providing it’s daytime) Better move at light-speed to get those curtains open! Or keep some sun lamps hooked to a clapper in your room.

*Expose them to garlic (of course, that much garlic will probably impede your social life anyway)

*Cut off their head (if you’re fast enough, strong enough, and just happen to carry around a sword or axe) Hopefully you get the kind that turns to dust, or that’s gonna be really messy.

*Distract them with seeds (supposedly they’re OCD about counting stuff, maybe you can keep them out ’til morning) Be aware, people are gonna think you’re a nutcase if you pour poppy seeds on your doorstep.

*Become a slayer (I’m sure there’s a Slayer Training Camp near you) It only takes special powers, years of study and training, and a good-looking British librarian type. You can do it!

****

Please note: This is purely designed for humor. Believe it or not, I have gotten comments where I posted this on my old blog, from people who claimed to be “real” slayers and “real” vampires.

 

Disclaimer: Links on this site may lead to affiliate sources to help support this blog. We appreciate all purchases, but you are under no obligation. Not all linked products have been tested by the site owners.

Related:

Briana’s Morning Yoga Challenge Day 19
Views 475
Welcome to day 19 of the challenge! If you're not sure what's going on, you can take a look at the introduction page. Be sure to comment and let me kn...
Cooking Isn’t “Gay” or “Wo...
Views 339
Image: © Briana Blair I posted yesterday about how much I love that Eric can not only cook and cook well, he enjoys it. He has no problem with or ...
Briana’s Morning Yoga Challenge Day 22
Views 845
Welcome to day 22 of the challenge! If you're not sure what's going on, you can take a look at the introduction page. Be sure to comment and let me kn...
Magical Herb of the Week: Anise
Views 607
This week's magical herb is anise. Anise has a taste similar to licorice, with sweet notes and is very fragrant. Jägermeister and Sambuca contain anis...

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*
*

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!