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A thought occurred to me while I was sitting here playing a game online. All too often, we live lives that a contradiction to how we want to live. Our actions are in direct opposition to the things we say we want. Whether it be society or some other force at work, we’ve learned to desperately want things, but not to take the actions required to get them.
How many times have you encountered a person who says they want to lose weight, but instead of eating healthy and working out they sit in front of the TV eating junk food? How many times have you seen someone say they want to do what they love but they keep doing things that they hate? How many times have you seen someone say they want to be a better person while constantly putting themselves and others down? Too often I bet. Maybe you’ve even done things like that yourself.
I know I’m guilty of it. I have to keep reminding myself that if I’m living in opposition to what I want, I’m not going to get what I want. It seems like a no-brainer, but look around, and you see how much it’s happening. What we say we want and what we’re doing don’t mesh. Then we bitch or whine or get depressed or curse god because our lives aren’t changing. News flash: A lot of it is our own damn fault.
One of my worst habits is working like mad even though I want to life a low-stress, chilled out life. I tell myself that I want to have a life where I work when I’m inspired, don’t when I’m not, and spend the rest of my time being good to myself and others, and enjoying my life. Not really conducive is it? Of course it’s compounded by people who say you have to work yourself into the ground so that you can enjoy your time later. That’s only true for people who want it to be.
I also frequently fall into the trap of saying I don’t want to judge my success by what other people have, but then that’s exactly what I do. I look at others who are selling more, selling at higher prices, living these lives of inspiration and success, and I compare myself to them in terms of how far I haven’t gotten and how much I haven’t made. I completely lose track of all my successes and the fact that I and my work have worth regardless of what anyone else is doing.
I’ve also been guilty of wanting to get healthier and then not doing anything about it. I’ve been working a lot on that though. I gave up almost all processed foods and started eating healthy. I’m switching to natural products, pampering my body and learning to relax. I even got back into yoga. Some of our self-sabotage is easier to snap out of than others.
Today has been an eye-opener for me in realizing that I have to live in sync with what I want. I need to love myself so I can be loved by others. I need to do what I love and stop worrying what other people think about it or how well other people are doing. I have to do things that are conducive to happiness and creativity. I have to have faith in my ability to be a success. Anything else is just trying to swim against the current.
