I’m not having a good day today. I seem to have caught something and I was running a fever yesterday. I feel a bit better today, but I’m still really stressed. I’ve had to do some things that I didn’t really want to do, and my life is pretty much up in the air at the moment. More than anything I just want for things to settle down so I can feel like I’m moving forward.
I’m sure you’ve all caught the various posts about us moving. At first we were going to be gone in mid December, then things happened and it was going to be the end of December. Then more things happened and we were in a strange holding pattern with no idea when we were going. Now it seems that we may need to be gone by the end of January, but we’re still not sure. It’s all just a mess, and it’s made it nearly impossible to figure out what to do. It doesn’t help that we’re still insanely short on funds and the fundraiser hasn’t gotten any new donations.
When we thought that we could be here as long as we wanted, I started settling back into working, but now that’s all screwed up again. I’m just completely stressed and I don’t know what I should be doing. I never wanted to move, and I was hoping that there might be some way out of it, but it looks like it’s going to have to happen. At the moment it looks like we have 4 weeks to find a place to live and find a way to move. We still can’t afford to buy all the things we’re going to need, so I don’t know what we’re going to do.
As for the thing I didn’t want to do… I want to be able to talk about it, but I don’t want to, if that makes any sense. Suffice it to say that some people did some really childish and cruel things, and I feel I have no choice but to do similar in return. It kind of sucks when doing what’s been done to you actually seems to be the right course of action. Unfortunately, that’s the way it is sometimes. I’m not happy about it, but there’s nothing that can be changed. It’s actually weird too, because I heard that one of these people is sick, and I actually care. Part of me thinks I shouldn’t, and a little voice in my head said it’s karma, but honestly, I can’t help but hope that they pull through. No matter what anyone says, I’m not that much of a bitch.
Overall I just want things to get settled. I want to be moved or not moved or whatever the hell is going to happen so that I can focus on work and stop stressing over all this crap. I just want to be able to devote my days to working and trying to make 2015 a better year. I believe that if I can really get into steady work, I can make some real improvements this coming year. I just need to be able to have the time and energy to do it.
I can’t tell you what’s going to happen to the blog over the next few weeks. Everything is so crazy. I’m trying to get what work done that I can, but I may not have the ability to do much writing. If anything I’ll probably work on Zazzle. Adding new products last week helped our sales, so that may be where I keep my focus on days when I have the time.