It’s taken me a long time to be able to feel this way, but more and more I’m learning to love people, even the ones I don’t know. My last post where I talked about everyone being deserving of love really made me think about that again, and I figured it was time for me to write about it. Every day I become more and more able to say that I actually love the people out there in the world.
I used to hate everyone, including myself. The first step I had to take was learning to love myself. As I realized what a good person I was, how talented and special I was, and how much I had to give to the world, I began to feel better and better about myself. As I felt better about myself, I slowly started to feel better about others. I started wanting to help everyone become their best selves so that they could know the feeling of loving themselves and others. It’s such a good feeling, I couldn’t help wanting to share.
It took a long time for me to start really loving others outside the ones I directly knew, either in person or online. Even then, they tested my patience. Honestly, they still do, but it doesn’t feel the same as it used to. I really hated people. I hated what selfish, stupid, mindless idiots they were. I was furious over how screwed up people were. Then as I grew as a person, I began to realize that it’s not the people I really hate, it’s what’s being done to them. It’s their flaws and the reasons for those flaws that I’m really angry at.
As time has gone by I find myself feeling that rage, but instead of thinking how much I hate whatever person for being broken and acting inappropriately, instead I try to feel love for them. I was so horribly broken once, and I still have room to grow. I’d have given anything for someone to love me, for someone to care enough to feel something for what I was going through, even when I didn’t realize that I was doing or feeling anything wrong. The people who hated me never helped me, but the few who loved me, they made a difference.
So I’m teaching myself to look at every single person, no matter how near or far, as if they’re a friend. If a friend was acting out, obviously messed up and needing help, hating them for doing the wrong things wouldn’t help them or anyone else. Loving them though, that would help. Offering them compassion and understanding and giving them someone to talk to, that helps. Even if they don’t know they need help yet, feeling compassion toward them changes the energy, and can start the healing process. At very least, you cease to be an active participant in the hateful, judgmental, negative energy cycle.
When it comes right down to it, I do love people. I love how they’re so different and unique, how they’re capable of so many things, of all the wonder that they have the potential for. I love people when they’re growing and changing and becoming better. I love people when they’re experiencing healing and joy. I love people when they’re learning to love themselves and others, and when they’re taking back their power. I love the way they make music and art and cures for disease and homes for animals and change people’s hearts. Despite all the bad in the world, there’s just so much to love about people.
Whenever I find myself thinking that I hate someone for what they’re doing I remind myself that they’re just broken right now, and that hating them won’t make them better. If I love them though, even from afar, and wish for their healing, well, they just might become better. If I know them, even when they’re testing my patience or showing their flaws, loving them will help them more than anger or hate.
Even though I’ve said it before, I think this bears repeating: I’ve already been a friend, mentor, counselor, sounding board or some combination thereof, for many people over the years. I still offer that. No matter who you are or where you are, if you need someone to talk to, someone to listen and care and maybe help, I’m always here. You can contact me privately using the contact form or FaceBook and I’ll be there for you. You may be a stranger, but I love you and want the best for you. My virtual doors are always open, and you’re always welcome.